one girl i started dating casually around this time after my last serious relationship was honestly a bit of an airhead. but, she was insanely hot (like out of my league level of hot).. and was popular. so i figured it might be fun for a while – lets see what happens.
why do the ultra hot ones usually turn out to be crazy? :/
so we dated… had sex a couple of times, and one time, she WITHOUT me asking, prompting, implying, or anything else – used her panties while giving me a handjob. it was great. but it was barely a blip on my radar. i didnt mention or comment on it.
as time went on, her airheadedness was really starting to wear on me. the simplest concepts escaped her, and i felt like i was always having to explain things to her. it wore on me to a point that i finally decided to end things peacefully one week. i told her that i just didnt see us together, and wanted to remain friends with her, and that i was sorry if it hurt her. she was upset, got mad and stormed out.
for the next couple of weeks, life became a roller coaster with her. she would go from furious that SHE was broken up with by me of all people…. to begging me to give her another chance.
i came home from school one day, grabbing the mail out of the mailbox as i did daily… and noticed there was something in the mailbox for me – it was a massive envelope and had a giant pink bow on the front, and had been put there by someone – not mailed. so i opened it up…. and she had taken nude polaroid’s of herself and sent them to me. they showed her face and everything. (yes, this is long before the days of cell phones and text messages)
there was a handwritten note in there saying she missed me, and look what i was missing out on. told me to call her and lets try one more time. looking in the envelope, i saw she also sent a pair of her panties. i put everything back in the envelope and shoved it into the back of my closet hidden away as i wasnt sure what to do with it – assuming someone in my family would see it if it was in the trash can.
a week went by and i was still just ignoring her. one day at school… i started having this group of people making under the breath comments around me “whisper whisper whisper panties” while pointing and laughing. then, the assholes just started coming right up to me… “hey, wear any panties lately fag?” and theyd all laugh.
to say i had an anxiety attack was the understatement of the century. i had no idea where it came from, who knew, how – or what they knew exactly. was someone peeking into my window at night? hiding in my bathroom? did my mom run around the school telling people something? wtf was happening?
one of my buddies finally came up after an entire day of torment and panic attacks and informed me… it was her my ex that sent me the photos – she was spreading some rumor about me wearing her panties – which i never had, nor had i mentioned to her. it was a wild and crazy guess, that just happened to hit the truth. now i knew this was all bs. i confronted her in the hallway and she admitted to it – said she made it up – and said that is what i get. then lashed out loudly.
i was furious. and i made a mistake that i did come to regret… but that came from a place of fear and anger.
i went home that evening, and went to my closet and got the pictures i was sent. i took them to a tiny corner store that had a photocopier – and got $10 worth of copies… which was around 500 pages. i copied all those photos… went to school early the next day and slid them into every locker on the first floor. then sat back and watched.
the school erupted that day. here is one of the most popular girls in school, in a homemade porn in hundreds of lockers. that was all the school talked about for weeks. she left school that day, and wound up transferring to another school.
i regret that i did that. it was cruel beyond belief. she didnt know that the rumor she started would affect me that badly… or that it was true… but – she did start it. she couldnt have known that for 8 hours… i was in a place of suicidal panic. it was an 8 hour anxiety attack. that torment was cruel and torturous and i wanted an eye for an eye. i should have taken the high road and endured… but i chose the cheap and easy route.